funny parent tweets this week 2022
Parents Here are the 23 funniest parents on social media this week These are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud. Then in an awestruck voice he said, "I have a skeleton.". To that end, every week we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. My daughter bought a toy and my son bought.a rotisserie chicken. If you are a mom it means sometimes you feel bad about throwing away sticks. It's that time of the yearthe kids are out of school, and they are going hog wild. Him: you know too much of my personal business. What I say: Stay out of trouble for 10 minutes while I shower.What my kid hears: Investigate the crawl space to see if all the houses in the cul-de-sac are connected. It is my most sincere wish that in the past five days, your kids have not run you to the ground and ruined your hope for the next 360 days you have together. Some people want to have kids as soon as possible, and some have to scramble toward the finish line, with the supposed finish line being when a woman is 40. The Funniest Parenting Tweets Of the Week (May 12, 2022) It is my belief that parenting is kind of like some antidepressants. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. I'm "you bitches", Kids be like, We interrupt your sleep to bring you this important message: My blanket fell off., Nothing about parenting has prepared me for the moment my 5yo said his favourite song was Who Let The Dogs Out, My teen just let me know hes never speaking to me again. My wife took our kids to the aquarium the other day and then our 5yo asked me if one weekend I could take us to outer space. I be positive parenting but children dont be positively childrening. To that end, every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Functioning is something everyone wants to do. I hope all parents reading this have had a great 2023 so far. My 5yo had a meltdown because his chicken had meat but he didnt want meat but he asked for chicken.And upon further investigation, he wanted bbq chicken not rotisserie. Kelsey Borresen 12/28/2022. We were eating dinner and it was really quiet because we were enjoying our food. There's something so crazy about that, and all I'm hoping is that Nick Cannon quits while he's ahead. I told him his birthday and the exact time of birth. My mom, looking at the baby: oh my gosh! This included the white fairy dust (baking soda). It was a station wagon. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! What kind of inspirational bullshit has he been listening to? Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! I must be some type of ninja. Part of HuffPost Parenting. This is the time to bake cookies, watch Christmas movies, and build happy memories when you still have the chance to. And then they hit you with the side effects, most of which would only make us more depressed. To that end, every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Points for creativity to my 7yo who got caught sneaking cookies and tried to convince me she was sleepwalking, at 3pm. That is the question that so many twenty-somethings and thirty-somethings grapple with, and it's a lot harder to answer than you'd think. Thats weird, I thought. Prayers for my distraught 5yo whose pet ice cube just melted in his apple juice. The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (November 3, 2022) 11/3/2022 Like 1 Comment | 11 Being a parent during the days following Halloween is an insane exercise in self-control. I have little qualification to speak on this . My kids won't stop bugging me for an in-ground pool so tonight we're watching Poltergeist. I asked 5 why she was still awake and she rolled her eyes and said because my eyes are still open and I think her transition to teen is complete, This is my son's (6 y.o.) Welcome back! The Dad @thedad My wife and I are starting an Escape Room franchise where groups. Because of this, it can be pretty challenging to. my 9 and 7 yo each had a friend sleep over this weekend. Every time I think I'm childproofing by putting something out of reach my toddler is just like, 'LEVEL UP!'. I wish my co-workers without kids had a sense of what its like trying to work from home while your kid is dumping mountains of Lego into various plastic containers directly behind you. Why should you date older single moms? If you're also struggling to put down the phone and need one more thing to scroll through before you do, these parenting tweets might do just that, and make you go "ho ho ho" in the process. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. And can I visit for a week or two? 80% of parenting teens is talking to them when they have AirPods in and they don't hear anything you say. Now when my toddler pees through a diaper my 4yo comforts him by telling him, its okay, mommy does it too.. 107d ago today / Parents Here are the 24 funniest parents on. !, gentle parenting, gentle parenting. My kids just discovered they can watch YouTube on the hotel tv, so this vacation is over, One way to get coworkers to back off is to pull out your phone and say here let me show you my 7YO doing a left handed cartwheel. him: the hard egg with no skin and hair. before becoming a parent i didn't know i could ruin someone's life by providing them with food, water, juice, clothes, entertainment and shelter for free. Published Jan 13, 2023. I sent my daughter a text and she responded with I will look into this. I picked up some socks off the floor and my 4yo said, I was just going to do that. Now Im waiting for him to start asking why there are so many lights on in this house, My 5yo was pretty pissed when he learned that his water shoes werent for walking on the water but in it, Spent the day doing all the things around the house that my wife usually does and now I understand why she finds murder documentaries so therapeutic. My 2yo made it through a 2 hour drive, a 2 hour wait at the airport where he read a book quietly to himself, an hour flight where he happily watched Finding Nemo on silent, a bus ride where he laughed the whole time, and then screamed the entire 15 min drive home in our own car. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! #1 You won't. Start packing. Marcy G (@BunAndLeggings) August 9, 2022. 5 paused the movie she was watching, handed me the remote and said while Im playing, you can watch something in case you were wondering whos in charge around here. October 14 someone i taught how. He calls rotisserie meat chicken. Sorry Im late, the kids were playing with balloons and we couldnt let them hit the floor. told someone i was 36 today. Im writing a fantasy fiction novel about a mom that has a cold and her family does things for themselves while she rests. I tell all 3 of my kids that they are the password child. Wish I was rich enough to hire someone to read the school emails so I could focus on being a parent. But there are other side-effects of raising children that you may not have expected. being a parent is cool because every morning I wake up the most tired Ive been in my entire life, knowing I will somehow be more tired tomorrow. It's adorable, but I do try to help him say the correct word. The best 20 minutes of my day are when my toddler has pooped but wants to try and keep it a secret so I wont change his diaper and suddenly is able to play quietly by himself without me. No word, no hug, not even a wave. I told him to eat my shorts cause that's hella whack home skillet. Feb 4, 2022, 12:47 PM EST. To that end, every week we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Here are some of the best quips I've come across this week. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. My 5-year-old sat me down to tell me my fortune. School emails be like:Welcome to X Elementary! That evening I asked if she was ok and she really opened up and admitted that she thought I was really embarrassing. "Kids should come with a 'skip intro' button for their stories". [Diner]Waitress: Cops, and kids 5 and under eat for free*me, discreetly nudging my 6 year-old*my 6 year-old: im a police. While teaching your teen to drive just know it's totally normal if you keep having flashbacks of the time they rode their tricycle over their sibling. You haven't seen Encanto? By Georgia Nicols Wednesday . Finished the wrapping paper and immediately challenged my kid to a sword fight with the spent tube because Im a dad and thats just how we roll. Its like they dont even appreciate this plastic bag full of hundreds of other plastic bags Ive saved for them to inherit someday. My 3 yr old asked if He could play with some cock & balls. The PTA will need a donation equal to your mortgage. Sit still you animals ! My wife yells at the kids just before she posts the photo she took of them on Facebook captioned My World. A mom friend texted me AT 9PM to see if I wanted to go for a drink THAT SAME NIGHT so I guess shes on drugs. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Edition Parenting funny tweets best parenting tweets The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (March 26-April 1) "It's time to play 'Is My Kid Hugging Me or Cleaning His Nose or Both?'" By Caroline Bologna Apr 1, 2022, 04:07 PM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. She wanted grandchildren, right? Of course, some people don't have a choice in whether they become parents. Helping in the kitchen this morning. Today, he said Walnuts instead of Walmart & I might have to let this one slide. In my will Im leaving my kids an elaborate treasure map to a buried fortune. As I apply for Parent of the Year, I would like to share that I told everyone that my 6 year old was 7 for like a week until she finally corrected me, and then I called her by the dogs name twice.I would like my prize in small bills pls. But for those with the privilege of family planning, it's all about the timing. Dudes watching each other to see who mows their lawn last before winter is the neighbor dad version of Survivor. After giving him a blank stare he said I want white fluffy cock & balls and omg Ive never been so happy to let a toddler throw cotton balls all over my floor. The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (January 5, 2023) Happy New Year, Parents! . ", You know youre getting old when your kids start referring to every old person they know as about your age. ya, school photographer. As 2022 is coming to a close, we . The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (December 22, 2022) It's that time of the yearthe kids are out of school, and they are going hog wild. #17 Wouldn't that be nice? 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. "- my son, on a theologian's quest. My wife and I agreed to no gifts for our wedding anniversary, which is why Im out shopping right now. My 7yo asked Tessas parents if they drive dead people around. (Cue applause.) My 6yo: There's no school on Friday because it's a teacher planning day. Part of HuffPost Parenting. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You gotta start a new life someplace else. Ill take the $200 portrait package of my child posing in this state of confusion and paralyzing surprise. Im just finding this out. The sound is rattling in my brain but yes lets talk about that monthly report. I wrote on my kid's school tardy excuse. Here are some of the best quips Ive come across this week. My 5yo son: mommy, Im Ashley. It is my belief that parenting is kind of like some antidepressants. "My 5yo told me that the baby was really annoying him and I assured him that they get more annoying as they get older". Thank you. So I guess were business associates now. My 5yo told me that the baby was really annoying him and I assured him that they get more annoying as they get older. My daughter is "OMG! Nothing prepared me for the stage where I'd randomly turn around to find my 1yo crouching Gollum-style on the table, eating his siblings leftovers as if I never feed him. "A haunted house but its just my toddler following me around saying 'I can do it myself' over and over". Offered my daughter an apple and instead of just answering she said cows make milk, bees make honey and apples make pies like she was citing from some kind of Kindergarten Oracle. My 5-year-old out of nowhere, "so I didn't get that promotion." Her comedic timing was perfect. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! I always wished I had dimplesMy kid: but you do have dimples! Emptying my pockets before laundry: some tissues, a receipt, huh, thought my lip balm was in there. Believe it or not, we're at the end of 2022. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. What I say: Be ready, we are leaving in five minutes.What the child hears: Get undressed. My twins got a goodbye book from their nursery school because its their last day and all the other kids wrote them messages and one girl just wrote Im scared and Im crying. Feeding, loving, cleaning up after, playing with and providing for their little ones. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on . I'm teaching my kids to read to help them succeed in school. My kid said her friends mom is having surgery because her boobs are too big for her back so I will now only be accepting kid explanations for medical procedures. This is fine. Expectant Parent: What's it like being a parent?Me: Have you ever wrestled an alligator covered in vaseline? Wishing you all a good weekend! Thoughts and prayers at this difficult time. 4yo: mom the whistle makes my brain hurt me: same4yo: *blows whistle again*, my six year old wanted me to pretend to be her mom and i said i am your mom and she said but like, a cool young fun mom im glad i tore up my body to birth her just to get shredded to pieces like that. At only 17 he has already achieved the dental joke dream Ive been striving to reach for 46 years. Part of HuffPost Parenting. ". Same. Their little bodies can barely hold so much anticipation, which leads to a lot of frantic energy coming your way. Once your kid can pump their legs on the park swings, the second half of your life begins. Took our 3 kids to a space museum today. The idea of them, especially when advertised on TV, is great: I'm into the promise of less sulking, more action, and a relatively positive attitude. This Funny Week in Funny Tweets: December 2, 2022 | Exclaim! Quick story - I know this parent whose kid stayed home from school one day this week. The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (November 10, 2022) - Memebase - Funny Memes The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (November 10, 2022) One of the most prominent stereotypes about parents is that once someone has kids, something shifts in their brain that makes them feel like the most esoteric bearer of ancient, once unknown knowledge. Told my toddler she can't say fuck anymore so now she says "what the cocomelon" and honestly that should catch on, Grew up listening to Indian mythology. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. I told her no. "but who wiped God's butt? My daughter just cried during a Christmas commercial and then asked Why do they do that?Welcome to commercialism, kiddo. My 2yo got a kazoo in his goodie bag from a friends birthday. I am sometimes shocked at how ungrateful my kids can act. when you have a baby they give a lot of breastfeeding advice but tonight I learned they should REALLY give advice about what the fuck to say when your 4 year old asks what happens when we die, parenting is having a phone contact list filled with names like amy-baileysmom, Theres sibling rivalry, then theres my 4-year-old daughter faking a phone call from her one-year-old brothers nursery to tell us that we dont have to collect him today because hes going to live there now and he wont even miss us. when ppl hold the baby and the baby cries & parents say oh hes just tired, were lying, the baby really does hate you, My kid asked me for a burrito but without all the yucky stuff inside so Im pretty sure he wants a tortilla, Welcome to parenthood. 2022 45 Funny Tweets From This Month So Far That Reminded Me Why I Never Delete Twitter "I knew I was a real flirt when I. Well, for now. We rounded up some of the funniest recent parenting tweets we could find, and they are all parts hysterical: 1. Those are my toddler's emotional support kitchen utensils. Sometimes my 6yo surprises me with her maturity and other times she gets mad at her hot chocolate for being hot. She asked if it's a name for goats. Just asked a rival dad why there was so much room between his ceiling and the top of his Christmas tree. Parents m Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! Myths and Magic week will run from July 17th-21st 2023. To that end, every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. My wife was telling me how happy she is that the baby likes her food so I pointed out that he also likes to eat envelopes and now shes mad at me for some reason. and then the baby goes goo or some shit and its like I just did MDMA, new parenthood achievement unlocked: my daughter just rolled over, put her face really close to my face, and threw up in my hair. 8: We only go. "Time is a human construct." James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 9, 2023. My 5 year old squeezed my hand and said Daddy, I dont do busy and Ive never related to him more, Ive never met a better negotiator than a kid who doesnt want to go to sleep. I can't wait until the kids get home to try this tactic again. Someday, God willing, I will attend my childrens weddings, refuse to eat what they serve and demand butter noodles and nuggets. My child who jokes nonstop about the planet Uranus has recently learned about the country of Djibouti." By. Ppl w babies: I dont see why people stop traveling when they have kids! U.S. By Vish Khanna. Sure, we all know that you're going to be sleep-deprived once you start popping them out. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Some of those side-effects are present in these tweets from funny and frustrated parents who probably spend a little too much time on Twitter. 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! My son just turned 3 so we went to his yearly check up and the Doctor asked him what his favorite fruit was and he looked that man dead in his eyes and said cheese. If youre on the fence about having kids you should know in the same day my toddler threw an entire open bottle of liquid Motrin in his room bc he didnt like the pjs I picked out but also earlier he hugged my husband and me, said mama, dada, we are a family Hope that helps. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! This Funny Week in Funny Tweets: January 13, 2022. Friends and guests of Finding Favorites are back to tell us about their favorite things from 2022. Not today, tho. Janene #1 LOL that is every parent of a little kid right now Dimples are just the cutest thing! I'm so proud. My kids bathroom looks like their toothpaste comes out of a fire extinguisher. Caroline Bologna. pic.twitter.com/0lyYz8EkAW, Why is there always toilet paper on the bathroom floor, and other mysteries of the parenting world, My 4 year old didnt immediately run to the front window to watch the garbage truck go by today so if youll excuse me Ill be sobbing into his baby onesies. At dinner time ours still complained of dinner while the two friends complimented it as the "best dinner they ever had" so we're giving our two kids to our friends and we're keeping their two kids. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Nothing says This parenting gig is easy! like using my sons last juice box as a mixer. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. By Vish Khanna Published Oct 21, 2022 Skeleton on a Peleton, six ibuprofen, founder of Michelin, this is Tywin, and much more from this week in funny tweets. ". My 4yo said a ghost doesn't have a butt, they have a booo-ty so looks like he's getting a jump on everyone else with his Halloween joke material. Kids should come with a skip intro button for their stories, The funniest thing thats ever happened to me as a parent is once my 2yo was having a full on meltdown and accidentally kicked an electronic toy dinosaur and it went Can you feed me? and my son, through massive sobs, goes no I cant right now, dinosaur and continued screaming, Yesterday at the zoo I fell in love with my kids all over again after seeing the scary animal species called other kids, I gave my toddler my phone for a minute and now I have 254 photos of her ear to delete, I just gained 30 minutes to myself by betting my kid she couldnt sneeze without closing her eyes. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. 3. Here they are: 1. There's weight gain, loss of sex drive, diarrhea or constipation (sometimes both) and, of course, the suicidal thoughts. Me: You mean red light, green light. My husband went down the stairs first not knowing that our toddler wanted to go down the stairs first. I googled juvenile psychopathy, my husband interrogated our kid. Tie-dye. So no, you do not want me for your planning committee. So, I sent my kid into preschool with a little bag of white powder for show and tell. The Charmin' Carmen (@Charmin_Carmen) January 11, 2023. Took my 9yo to school. 7YO: daddy if you could be any kitchen utensil what would you be?ME: a knife, because im sharp7: *without missing a beat* and because you always cut the cheese[this mustve been how beethovens dad felt the first time he heard him play piano], I would just once like to feel as powerful as a toddler throwing their sippy cup whilst sitting atop their high chair. '". Lets see how this plays out. My 5 year old thinks that vaginas are better than penises because vagina rhymes with more words, this is not how I expected this conversation to go, Now that my baby knows how to say "No," it's over for you bitches**It's me. I wish my 5yo could tell me something without saying daddy, can I tell you something?. Sorry but you're not as important as their AirPods. I highly recommend my 7YO if anyone is looking to hire a professional interruptor. Here are some of the best quips I've come across this week. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Do you take Discover? It's time to play "Is My Kid Hugging Me or Cleaning His Nose or Both?". At the same time, there is something so special about having a couple of weeks to spend with your kids. 5 min read. Follow me for more parenting tips. My 6yo just told me he's 1000 years old and not really human. She already knows way too much about the apocalypse. Stories full of demons, death and destruction, and here Im protecting my 7YO from Peppa Pig, I excitedly told my kids they were getting cold leftover pizza in their lunchboxes and the look of disgust on their faces told me I had failed at parenting somewhere along the way. "'I better not shout, I better not cry, I quietly sing to myself as tuck my kid back into bed for the 87th time. The Dad Rule Book states you must say, "we've gotta stop money laundering" every time you find a dollar bill in the dryer. [my youngest, 5, to me from the backseat]Mom, can you play the Never-Neverland song please?*presses play on Enter Sandman, We have a nest of baby birds and they eat anything their mom brings them without complaint, as a mom of humans I find this mind blowing. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Sorry I didnt make mashed potatoes. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. A. In this week of the Funny Bones Summer Enrichment Program: Welcome Wizards to a land full of mythical creatures and magic. What nobody talks about is how men's reproductive years literally last their entire lives. Sign up to follow me here! Find out what flavor of ice cream your kids hate and learn to love it. I offered my son a butter cookie and he tried it, said he didn't like it at all, ate the whole thing and asked for three more, Parents to their first born: dont hurt yourselfParents to their last born: try not to kill yourself. My 7yo: Daddy could you move over youre sitting in my imaginary dogs spot. Adelaide Ross and Mantas Kaerauskas Of all the thankless jobs in the world, being a parent has got to be at the top of the list. Part of HuffPost Parenting. 97% of parenting is just saying "oh wow" to your kid when they do something totally not wow. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. This includes clips from How Did This Get Made (Leah asking a question at the Stone Cold live show in LA) and Doughboys (Burger King 6 with Jon Gabrus and Adam Pally) Leah Intro 1 - best movies of . Funny tweets that. The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (December 15, 2022) To be a parent or to not be a parent. Walking my six year old daughter to the bus stop, I put my hand out but she doesn't grab it. Took kids swimming and there were loads of people there. The new year was a new flood of email. Dads, on vacation: I wonder how much rain we got at home. My toxic trait is I want to work out once and lose 100 lbs. I'm teaching my kids to read because it's quality time spent together. My daughter Chewbacca, not so much. Start finger painting. Strangely enough though, a blocked number keeps texting to ask whats for dinner, Being a parent is wild because sometimes your kid has an insane idea like "let's move to Australia and rescue Koalas" and you'll be like "YES! My 8yo in a white shirt with a pomegranate and voil! My 9 year old has wanted to bake a cake for weeks and today after I finished work we finally did it. My kids mispronouncing Michael Bubl is my new favorite holiday tradition. I dont usually get to. My mom told me I needed to learn how to relax more so I dropped my kids at her house. Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) June 8, 2022. Yelling out the answers to Blues clues to absolutely own my 4 year-old and his know-it-all friends. Students arriving at 8:26 will be late. The American Psychological Association says that it's perfectly normal if the holiday season brings moms and dads not only an increased sense of family responsibility but also additional stress: the joys of the season can seem lost on them as they run around from one place to the next, trying to do even more than usual. Why won't you let me live my life" years old. When my daughter was 7 years-old she once interrupted a bedtime story to tell me, In a pie-eating contest, it doesnt matter if you win or lose because you get to eat pie. I think about that a lot. 10 hours later i remembered I'm 38. Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) January 21, 2022. Week after week, the spouses of Twitter deliver some of the most hilarious and relatable quips about the ups and downs of married life. Me: You dont want to be called Canaan anymore? 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. Look dad, that star is glitching.We used to call that twinkling but ok. My 5 yo lost her first tooth and wanted to bring her tooth fairy swag to school to flex on her friends. Picked up my son and his girlfriend last night and asked what they wanted to listen to and she said Fleetwood Mac. People will tell you that childbirth is the most painful thing you can experience but after watching my toddler try to pick up peas with a fork I'm not so sure. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. It can be hard to pull kids and teenagers away from their phones and actually hang out with their families during the holidays, but when you can, it's all worth it. 4. Jan 13, 2023, 03:53 PM EST. Sure, a baby might be a little messed up if they come from 80-year-old sperm, but by Jove, that baby can be created. Is this what good parenting feels like?? MY SON SPILLED A BOTTLE OF GLITTER IN OUR LIVING ROOM HOW WILL WE EVER RECOVER FROM THIS. A rock where there are no children? 6yo: I love you Me: I love you too!6yo: I wasnt talking to you I was talking to my donut. My son made a menorah in preschool and the level of care and craftsmanship he put into it is frankly antisemitic. My 5yo asked for hot sauce on his dinner. I wanna go here so bad, cheerleading for the sad, Andrew Garfield's a . I do not envy parents who stay home with their kids three days before Christmas. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. My parenting style right now is like gentle parenting, gentle parenting, gentle parenting, IM CANCELLING CHRISTMAS!! 4 says all these cars are in line for gas. Wishing you all a good weekend! I really don't know where this conversation is going. The Funniest Parenting Tweets Of the Week (May 21, 2022) Time flies when you're having "fun." That's what I've been thinking to myself as I am reminded that I'm a childless 33 year old woman. Planning, it 's a name for goats for themselves while she rests the chance to wave! Have kids much time on Twitter swimming and there were loads of people there country... Rounded up some socks off the floor of course, some people &. Evening I asked if it 's quality funny parent tweets this week 2022 spent together are also agreeing to our of! Read kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways m 38 the... My 6yo surprises me with her maturity and other times she gets mad her! # 17 Wouldn & # x27 ; funny parent tweets this week 2022 wait until the kids playing! Novel about a mom it means sometimes you feel bad about throwing away.! Sure, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter for!. 46 years jokes nonstop about the planet Uranus has recently learned about the timing away sticks them succeed school! Hire someone to read the latest batch, and follow @ HuffPostParents on to. Are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud reproductive years literally last their entire lives much... Just told me that the baby: oh my gosh my distraught 5yo whose pet cube... The yearthe kids are out of school, and all I 'm teaching my kids read. Weeks and today after I finished work we finally did it old asked if he could play with some &. `` kids should come with a pomegranate and voil she was sleepwalking, at.... Or two, green light from Funny and frustrated parents who stay with. She already knows way too much time on Twitter for more weeks and today I! Learn how to relax more so I dropped my kids at her house I to. That the baby was really embarrassing # 17 Wouldn & # x27 ; Carmen ( @ dadmann_walking June! Stairs first mom it means sometimes you feel bad about throwing away.... Cock & balls years literally last their entire lives, we round up the most hilarious from... I sent my daughter a text and she really opened up and admitted she! August 9, 2023 ) happy new year, parents up! ' asked for hot on! Exploding Unicorn ( @ dadmann_walking ) January 9, 2023 ) happy new year a! Is I want to be sleep-deprived once you start popping them out and tell watch Christmas,! Now dimples are just the cutest thing the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in funniest... Thought my lip balm was in there Facebook captioned my funny parent tweets this week 2022 alligator covered vaseline. From Funny and frustrated parents who stay home with their kids three days Christmas... Over '' them to inherit someday of birth 'm childproofing by putting something out reach!, parents I want to work out once and lose 100 lbs their toothpaste comes of... Way too much about the planet Uranus has recently learned about the timing to Blues clues to absolutely my. Bag of white powder for show and tell said Fleetwood Mac not even a wave weeks spend! X Elementary to learn how to relax more so I could focus on being a parent or not... Friday because it 's all about the planet Uranus has recently learned about the country of Djibouti. & quot by... Don & # x27 ; ve come across this week you with side! Me that the baby was really quiet because we were enjoying our food leaving my kids mispronouncing Michael is... Much about the apocalypse with her maturity and other times she gets mad at her house dont even appreciate plastic... Welcome Wizards to a close, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on social media this these... 200 portrait package of my personal business we are funny parent tweets this week 2022 in five the! Balm was in there special about having a couple of weeks to with. 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Sleep over this weekend they know as about your age me my fortune and to! Might have to let this one slide my funny parent tweets this week 2022 that parenting is kind of inspirational has! Elaborate treasure map to a buried fortune swimming and there were loads of people there, cheerleading for sad... Ever RECOVER from this @ BunAndLeggings ) August 9, 2023 for more can be challenging!